Missouri’s 8 Best Interests Factors: Factor #8 – The child's input by Kirby Minor, Divorce & Custody Lawyer in Lee's Summit

Divorce & Custody Lawyer in Lee's Summit:

Missouri law (§ 452.375.2(8), RSMo) requires courts to consider:

“The unobstructed input of a child, free of coercion and manipulation, as to the child’s custodial arrangement.”

Important Note on Recent Statutory Change:

This factor used to be worded as “the wishes of the child.” The Missouri legislature deliberately changed the language to “unobstructed input… free of coercion and manipulation.” This shift emphasizes that the child’s voice is only valuable when it is authentic and uncoerced. Courts now focus more on whether the child’s statements reflect their true feelings or have been influenced by pressure, alienation tactics, rewards, or threats from a parent.

Factor #8 is the final and often most sensitive factor in the best-interests analysis. It addresses the child’s preferences regarding custody and parenting time — but only when that input is genuinely free from adult interference.

Sun Tzu – Know the Enemy and Know Yourself

Sun Tzu would treat this factor as the ultimate intelligence test. He would never attempt to force or script the child’s statements, but would carefully expose any manipulation by the other side while ensuring his own conduct demonstrates respect for the child’s authentic voice.

Strategy:

Create an environment where the child feels safe expressing their true feelings. Document any evidence of coaching, bad-mouthing, pressure, or punishment by the other parent. Show through consistent actions that you support the child having a healthy relationship with both parents, not forced loyalty to you.

Missouri Application:

Jackson County judges give greater weight to a child’s input only when it appears natural and uncoerced. When alienation or manipulation is evident, the child’s stated wishes can be discounted or even used against the manipulating parent.

Musashi – Do Not Let Your Mind Abide Anywhere

Musashi would warn that becoming fixated on “winning” the child’s loyalty creates dangerous rigidity. Pressuring a child often backfires.

Strategy:

Stay disciplined and detached. Avoid any appearance of coaching, bribing, or punishing the child for their preferences. Focus on creating safety so the child can speak freely. Document coercive behavior by the other parent factually and without escalation in front of the child.

Missouri Application:

Judges and GALs are highly skilled at detecting alienation. The parent who appears to genuinely support the child’s emotional freedom usually gains credibility.

Lao Tzu – Be Like Water

Lao Tzu would advise flowing gently around the child’s natural feelings rather than trying to direct or control them.

Strategy:

Use calm, reassuring language that the child is allowed to love both parents without fear. Avoid negative comments about the other parent in the child’s presence. If manipulation is occurring, document it carefully while keeping the child out of the conflict as much as possible.

Missouri Application:

Direct involvement of children as witnesses is risky. Most Jackson County judges strongly prefer to avoid putting children on the stand unless every other avenue has been exhausted. Involving the child directly can easily backfire, creating resentment or further alienation.

The Tengu (Tengu Geijutsu Ron) – Transcend Win/Lose

The tengu teaches that true mastery comes from emptiness — seeing beyond victory or defeat to the child’s genuine well-being.

Strategy:

Rise above the desire to “win” the child’s allegiance. Prioritize the child’s right to have their own authentic thoughts and feelings without fear of consequences.

Missouri Application:

When coercion is present, courts may discount the child’s input or view the manipulating parent unfavorably across multiple factors.

Special Section: Hearsay Issues and the Role of the Guardian ad Litem (GAL)

Because most Jackson County judges are extremely reluctant to have children testify in open court (they view it as potentially harmful and will only allow it as a last resort), the Guardian ad Litem usually becomes the primary channel for the child’s input. The GAL can interview the child privately and report those statements to the court. However, this creates hearsay issues — the child’s out-of-court statements are generally hearsay and may not be admissible for the truth of the matter asserted unless they fall under a recognized exception (e.g., statements regarding the child’s then-existing mental or emotional condition).In practice:

• GAL reports often carry significant weight even with hearsay concerns because the GAL is an officer of the court acting in the child’s best interests.

• Judges frequently consider the GAL’s observations and impressions of the child’s demeanor and consistency.

• If one parent alleges the other is coaching or alienating the child, the GAL’s independent assessment becomes even more critical.

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Strategic takeaway: It is almost always better to let the GAL speak for the child rather than pushing for direct testimony. Involving the child as a witness should be used with the utmost caution — it can easily backfire by damaging the parent-child relationship or causing the judge to question the motives of the requesting parent.

Why Factor #8 Matters Deeply

This factor protects children from being used as pawns. Courts want to hear the child’s voice — but only when it is truly their own. Coercion, alienation, or manipulation can severely damage the offending parent’s case and affect multiple other factors.

Facing Issues with a Child’s Input in Your Case?

If you are concerned about coercion, manipulation, parental alienation, or how your child’s preferences are being presented in a Jackson County custody or modification case, experienced strategic guidance is essential. The Law Office of Kirby Minor helps clients navigate these sensitive issues with care and discipline. We know how to protect the child’s authentic voice, work effectively with GALs, document alienation when it exists, and argue Factor #8 effectively while minimizing harm to the parent-child relationship. Text or Call 816-888-0632 for a consultation. Let’s ensure your child’s true input is heard clearly and freely, free from coercion or manipulation. Oss.