Missouri’s 8 Best Interests Factors: Factor #2 by Divorce & Custody Attorney in Lee's Summit

by Divorce & Custody Attorney in Lee's Summit Kirby Minor:

“The needs of the child for a frequent, continuing and meaningful relationship with both parents and the ability and willingness of parents to actively perform their functions as mother and father for the needs of the child.”

Missouri law (§ 452.375.2, RSMo) lists eight specific factors courts must consider when determining the best interests of the child in custody and parenting time decisions. Factor #2 is one of the most powerful and frequently contested in Jackson County cases:

“The needs of the child for a frequent, continuing and meaningful relationship with both parents and the ability and willingness of parents to actively perform their functions as mother and father for the needs of the child.”

This factor directly supports Missouri’s strong public policy favoring frequent, continuing, and meaningful contact with both parents. It also examines each parent’s demonstrated willingness and ability to actually show up and parent — not just claim they want to. Here’s how some of history’s greatest strategy minds would approach this factor to help the court see it in your favor.

Sun Tzu – Know Yourself and Know the Enemy

Sun Tzu would treat this factor as reconnaissance. He wouldn’t simply assert “I want frequent contact” — he would prove his own ability and willingness while exposing the other parent’s shortcomings.

Strategy:

Build an ironclad record showing your consistent involvement (school events, medical appointments, daily parenting logs) while calmly documenting the other parent’s interference, cancellations, or lack of engagement. Present a detailed parenting plan that demonstrates you understand and can meet the child’s actual needs.

Missouri Application:

Jackson County judges look for concrete evidence of “ability and willingness.” The parent who shows up reliably and documents the other side’s failures on this factor often gains the edge when arguing for equal or expanded parenting time.

Musashi – Do Not Let Your Mind Abide Anywhere

Musashi would warn against fixation on a perfect schedule or punishing the other parent. Clinging too tightly creates rigidity.

Strategy:

Clearly state your wish for frequent, meaningful contact, but remain adaptable. Show the court you are willing to facilitate the child’s relationship with the other parent (when safe) while proving your own consistent performance as a parent. Avoid ego-driven demands — focus on the child’s needs.

Missouri Application:

This factor rewards maturity and flexibility. The parent who demonstrates they can actively parent without turning every issue into a war gains credibility with the judge and GAL.

Lao Tzu – Be Like Water

Lao Tzu would approach this factor with softness and flow. Water nourishes without force and finds the lowest place.

Strategy:

Express your wishes without aggression. Emphasize your willingness to support the child’s relationship with both parents while gently highlighting your own consistent, active parenting. Frame everything around the child’s need for stability and meaningful contact.

Missouri Application:

Judges and GALs notice when a parent actively performs their role versus one who interferes or abdicates. The “water-like” parent who flows toward cooperation while proving reliability often prevails on this factor.

The Tengu (Tengu Geijutsu Ron) – Transcend Win/Lose

The tengu would remind you there is no true opponent — victory and defeat are illusions. The real battle is ensuring the child’s needs are met.

Strategy:

Present your wishes from a place of emptiness, free from ego. Focus purely on the child’s need for frequent, continuing, and meaningful contact with both parents. Show your own willingness to actively parent while demonstrating how the other parent’s actions may be interfering with that need.

Missouri Application:

The parent who transcends “me vs. them” and keeps the focus on the child’s relational needs usually earns the court’s trust. Non-duality helps you avoid self-sabotage and strengthens your position on this critical factor.

Why Factor #2 Is Often Decisive

This factor goes to the heart of Missouri’s public policy favoring frequent, continuing, and meaningful contact. The parent who can prove both their own active involvement and the other parent’s willingness (or lack thereof) to facilitate that contact frequently gains significant ground — whether seeking equal time, primary custody, or enforcement. Over the coming posts, we’ll continue examining each of the 8 factors through the eyes of these strategy masters. If you’re in a contested custody or modification case in Jackson County (or surrounding county), bring strategic wisdom to how you argue the best interests factors. The Law Office of Kirby Minor helps clients build compelling, child-centered cases while navigating all 8 factors with clarity and discipline. Call or text 816-888-0632 for a consultation. Let’s make sure the court sees your active role — and your child’s need for both parents. Oss.